“Fortune Favors The Bold”
You can play life, or life can play you
This article will uncover how to hack into the simulation. Edit the line of code named ‘probabilities’, tweaking it to rig it in your favor. Giving you an unfair advantage. The house edge.
“It’s only after we’ve lost everything we’re free to do anything”
Show up to the table with nothing to lose and you’ve rigged the game in your favor. Unlimited rolls of the dice. Cashing out the wins and never having to pay anything when you ‘lose’
We all have a gambling problem, and it’s got nothing to do with Vegas.
The more you play the game, the better you get at the game
We’ve been conditioned to misinterpret rejection as final and tied to our self worth. In school we either get a good grade or a bad grade. There is no do-overs, and our parents approval of us would often reflect our grades. If you asked out your crush and got rejected it would sting a lot more as a kid. The other kids would find out. It would sting a lot because as a kid it’s not like there is much else going on in our world.
No bills, responsibility, it’s not like we could just get in our car and engage in hobbies. In this fixed childhood environment we magnify things which leave imprints on us. Later becoming ‘baggage’ aka showing up to the table with ‘things to lose’
But then we enter the real world. Where we often still hold these artificial beliefs. In reality if you launch a business and it does not start off well. Unlike an exam, you can make adjustments, it’s not the end, there are endless do-overs allowed. But we naturally tie in our self-worth to our ‘rejections’ because of our childhood experiences.
Baggage is bringing something to the table to lose. When there is baggage there is less movement, more timidity, you roll the dice less, play less hands.
There are TWO MAJOR powers you unlock when you show up with nothing to lose. The best way to illustrate this is with these scenarios:
What showing up with something to lose looks like
Brady (baggage), Nate (no baggage)
Nate has no baggage. Nate wants to start a YouTube channel. He starts uploading videos 4x per week. 10 weeks later he has 40 videos and is gaining a lot of traction.
Brady has baggage. He wants to start a YouTube channel. But he brings with him something to lose. He wonders what his friends will think, what he’s family will think, what his co-workers will think. Because of all this pondering in his head he is investing more emotion into the thought of the channel. Making it a bigger deal than it actually is. This is just like a financial investment, he now has something to lose.
This emotional investment gets his self worth involved. After weeks of mustering up courage he posts his first video. But in order for Brady to make a video he needs to be in a very motivated state to overcome the baggage. Because of his huge emotional investment he creates EXPECTATION. Leading him to be let down from the small number of views. Because of this he uploads once every other week. After 10 weeks he has posted 5 videos and has gained almost no traction.
Both Nate & Brady are doing the exact same thing. They could even be identical people. But the perception of Nate allows him to play 40 hands, Brett is more timid in his play and plays only 5 hands. This also makes Nate a much develop better player. Because he got almost 10x more reps.
Here is an even more intense example of how this bleeds into every area of life
Nate has no baggage. When he sees a girl interested in him he usually goes and talks to her. If it goes well he gets her number and sets up a date. Nate is going on a handful of dates every month. Then the special one comes along. As usual he goes to talk to her. Because he has experience doing this (playing this hand) it goes pretty well and he get’s her number to set up a date.
It’s not unfamiliar territory for him. He wants it to work and he finds this girl amazing. But he is not desperate. Not as some mindset trick he is consciously doing. But he genuinely has other options and he’s not viewing this as a big deal. He’s not emotionally flaccid and not caring. But he is also not investing a emotional mortgage on someone he just met. Balanced.
The date comes along and it is exciting for Nate, not worrying.
He is not timid, he is bold and fun. He is able to ‘risk’ more. Meaning showing his true humor, tastes, personality and opinions. He has nothing to lose so he can roll the dice and show his true self. If it wins, it’s a big win as they both authentically match. If it loses, “darn a good one got away”. But he’s not losing sleep over it. Because he didn’t show up to the table with piles of disproportionate emotional investment to lose.
Brady has baggage. When he sees a girl interested in him, he carries on his way and never says anything. Eventually a girl new to Brady’s friend group makes it very easy for him to get to know her better. Brady gets her number and sets up a date 4 days away.
Brady is very excited, it’s been such a long time since he’s been on a date. Over the next 4 days he thinks a lot about her. Just like in our first scenario all this emotional investment creates….INVESTMENT. Just like finance he is withdrawing emotional capital and investing it into something before it’s even shown to be a good investment.
Because he is now HEAVILY invested he has something to lose. Also this is a rare chance for him, he hasn’t been on a date in a year. FOMO kicks in adding more emotional capital to the investment. He’s not investing this emotional capital for no reason. The root cause is that it is a big deal for him. It’s his first date in a while, and maybe he doesn’t have much else going on in his life. He may have old emotional baggage. So naturally that’s where all the attention is paid.
4 days later it’s time for the date. Unlike Nate he is timid. He doesn’t want to do anything that she wouldn’t find cool. He is playing it safe. Not only is this inauthentic, it is very boring. Because he has shown up to the table with something to lose he’s being way too timid, not ‘risking’ vulnerability by showing his authentic self. Instead he is projecting a character of what he thinks she will like. Based on how much he’s emotionally invested he really needs this investment to ‘win’.
As you could guess this timid and boring date did not lead to a second date. Brady is now crushed. Why is he crushed? Because he LOST something. He invested so much emotion early on. He did this because he’s not rolling the dice enough in his life. Making this one roll, this one poker hand a MUST win.
(In the upcoming section ‘natural orientation for balance’ we reveal the shocking root of this behavior and how to dissolve it)
When all that pressure is added it ruins your ability to express yourself, it makes you timid. It makes you calculating and stuck in your head. Less authentic and not present in the moment.
When you’re not present in the moment you don’t even see or appreciate the person in front of you. 70% of your mental bandwidth is clogged solving equations in your mind in a non present state of what you think they want to see.
Whether you’re on a date, making a video, writing a book, in a client meeting, playing poker, playing basketball. Whatever it is you’re doing. This clogged state of mental bandwidth is a guarantee path to failure. To rub people the wrong way, come across as desperate, come across as inauthentic and repel people away.
Notice the two major powers that come when you show up to the table with nothing to lose
- 1 You can roll the dice more often, able to play more hands
- 2 You get better at playing the game
Investing large quantities of our emotions before taking any action and getting feedback. Making assumptions. Projecting old beliefs. This is all baggage we bring to the table. Bringing something to lose. When in reality these chips we paid for and brought to the table were never even needed to buy in and to start playing.
Technically there are infinite number of realities we can experience and live within as our default reality. But to illustrate a very powerful point let’s design a fixed number of realities.
12) Happy/Great Health/Good Wealth/Great Relationships/Great Friendships/Easy results
31) Happy/Good Health/Great Wealth/Good Relationships/Good Friendships/Easy results
9,981) Unhappy/Bad Health/Good Wealth/Bad Relationships/Good Friendships/Hard results
3,427) Unhappy/Good Health/Great Wealth/Bad Relationships/Good Friendships/Hard results
304) Alright/Good Health/Good Wealth/Good Relationships/Bad Friendships/Hard results
1 ) Happy/Great Health/Great Wealth/Great Relationships/Great Friendships/Easy results
Reality One represents the highest reality we are all after. Great in all the categories.
….. 18,564 possible combinations
1 we are all after and about 153 very good runner up realities of a good lives.
This is the part you don’t want to zone out on. This will be the most depressing thing you read until the last bit, then it will be the most exciting and inspiring thing you’ll read.
There is a 0.005387% chance of living in that top reality. Reality One
But it is misinterpretation to say it is difficult. Because it’s not a game of probabilities. It’s an equation. Like a calculus exam if you don’t know how to solve the equation there is a less than 0.005387% chance your guess is right.
But if you do know how to solve the equation….it’s guaranteed.
Calculus is not difficult. Going through Navy SEAL training with asthma and a sprained ankle is difficult. Calculus is not difficult we just don’t understand it yet.
How do we get better at calculus? By learning how it’s done and solving equations. We have access to all the information online, the strategies are all available. Strategies for making money, great relationships, getting fit, having fun etc..
But we get in our own way by not playing enough hands to develop the skillet, gain wisdom and understanding of how the game works. Showing up to the table with something to lose.
It’s simple math here. A guy who plays 10,000 hands is a better player and will win more than a guy who has played 25 hands. A guy who has solved 1,000 calculus equations will be better than a guy who has solved 1 after just learning how.
Showing up to the table with nothing to lose is how you gain an unfair advantage. The default conditioning is to avoid failure, overly invest emotions, involve self worth. With none of that baggage you play enough hands to become a grand-master in a world full of beginners and intermediates.
“Feedback only determines strategy not self worth”
Bet on yourself. You play the hand. You either win and get a result. Or you get feedback on how to tweak your strategy the next hand. You only lose if you bring something to the table to lose.
Play for the love of the game. When your focus is on the result you tend to WAY over-invest emotions and lose sight of the process, the small task right in-front of you, the hand that needs to be played right now. Making it out to be a bigger deal than it needs to be. Attaching the huge emotions of the result and stuffing them into the present moment. Creating baggage, expectation, disproportionate emotional investment and something to lose.
Strip perception and see reality for what it is. The small task is not a big deal. Each action taken, each hand you play is not a big deal. The emotional illusion leading to over investing is all made up in the mind. It becomes a resistance of energy we must plow through to get ‘motivated’ enough to take action.
How can we begin to cultivate this way of being? Betting on ourselves. Dissolving the artificial fears of taking action.
The 40% Rule
When you have 40% certainty. Play the hand. Start that business, talk to that girl, put out that content, write that book. Whatever it is. It’s impossible to get 100% certainty. Our GPS and Google generation has this delusion of seeking 100% before taking action. It’s impossible you will never get to 100% certainty.
You have a gift called awareness and adaptability. Pull the trigger, fire the missile.
You don’t need to be 100% accurate, just pointed in the right direction by about 40%. Because your awareness and adaptability give your missile heat seeking capability. Once it’s in flight, once action is taken you will course correct mid-flight based on the heat data (feedback you get from action).
So then here is the rule
Once you have 40% certainty, pull the trigger. There is no added benefit in timidity. Take action with the confidence and bravado of 100% certainty. Being timid and showing up with something to lose. Beating around the bush WILL NOT soften the blow of failure, IT WILL increase the chance of failure as we saw with Brady. It changes your vibe, your actions, and thoughts.
Trust the Process – Poker Leveling Theory
It’s all just practice for the big moments. Each hand you play makes you a better player. Empowering you to win more hands. Each hand you play can also be your big win.
“With great power comes great responsibility”
As we mentioned earlier we have access to all the strategies and information we need. We take this power for granted and avoid doing the work. Because WITHOUT ACTION, without playing hands, information is never converted into Wisdom.
Poker Leveling & Intuition
Until things become base instincts we can’t move to the next level. Whether it’s shooting free throws or playing poker. Here is what it looks like in poker leveling theory:
- Level One – Just learned to play the game and what hands are winning hands. The focus is “What do I have? Is it a winning hand?”
- Level Two – Once that becomes base instinct without conscious effort the focus then becomes “What do I have?” and “What does he have?”
- Level Three – “What do I have?”, “What does he have?”, “What does he think I have?”
- Level Four – “What do I have?”, “What does he have?”, “What does he think I have?”, “What does he think I think he has?”
If you’re new to soccer and are working to get better at shooting on goal. The basics like lock your ankle, don’t lean back, etc.. Until that’s a base instinct without conscious effort you can’t possibly move onto the higher levels of targeting, hip alignment, curve techniques etc.
There is no way to shortcut the process
We believe that having access to amazing training online is a shortcut to skip the process. It is a head start to get you rolling with a proven strategy. Whether that is business, social skills, sports, crafts, music, writing whatever it is.
But beyond the actual skills being developed a KEY FACTOR that makes Wisdom more potent than information is EMOTION. I’ve heard what I needed to hear back in 2015. But until I actually lived it that lesson was not ingrained with emotion.
“Lessons not learned in blood are soon forgotten” – Abe Lincoln
The way we stay consistent and take action is being process oriented vs results obsessed. Like Brady on his dates or with his YouTube aspirations he was overly invested because his baggage made him require a result to gain self worth. He was way over invested which makes doing the process a big deal. Showing up to the table with something to lose.
Natural Orientation For Balance
The root of being irrationally obsessed with the result and irrationally over invested stems from our brains natural orientation for balance. Brady had baggage which made him express himself in the world as NEEDY. Nate did not have baggage.
Here is the cheat code. Here is what this looks like, Here is a key that can set you free right now to rig life in your favor:
So we have two options to get in balance and enter homeostasis.
- Option One – THE DEFAULT APPROACH WE NATURALLY THINK WE NEED TO TAKE. Which is GETTING, CHASING tons of MASSIVE wins and approvals to balance out our baggage.
- Option Two – Hack the simulation and dissolve the old baggage. Which allows us to stack small wins because we don’t feel the NEED to avoid small opportunities and put all our eggs into one big one. To then try and force it to work
You can let it go. Right now. Now that it’s in your awareness it can be dissolved. By focusing on whats in front of you. Being process oriented knowing the result comes as your skill develops and as you play more hands your more likely to hit a win. Leave beliefs, assumptions, and self judgement where it belongs… IN THE PAST, because that’s where it came from.
To project these beliefs and assumptions on whats in front of you right now is literally trapped in a trance. A glitch in the simulation reliving the past over and over again. As we saw with Brady. He could very well be an even cooler guy than Nate, a better YouTuber, a better lover.
But his baggage ruined his ability to play the game….
PRESUME LESS, PERCEIVE MORE
Focus on whats in front of you. The hand you’re playing in this moment is not a BIG DEAL. Because you take advantage each day of the opportunities you won’t overly invest emotionally putting all your emotional capital in one basket. It’s all part of the process, it’s all practice for the big moments. Feedback only determines strategy not self worth. Do your best and forget the rest.
Bringing it All Together
Showing up with nothing to lose is your unfair advantage. You can only win. You get the win, or you get the experience and wisdom to become better at winning. Developing your character, skills, and strategy.
With this understanding we can dissolve being results obsessed and become more process oriented. Because it’s universal truth that the REAL REWARD in life is not what you get it’s who you become.
The car, the house, the relationships, friends, cool clothes etc can all be taken from you. But if you have the ability from developing your skills….you can always get it back. That confidence and peace is the real reward of life. Paradoxically when you live this way you end up getting MORE RESULTS, BETTER RESULTS, and RESULTS WITH MORE EASE.
Because like day-traders the ones who focus on the money fail. The ones who focus on the craft master the craft and money is a byproduct of the craft.
“Feedback only determines strategy not self worth” – character development is the real win. Resourcefulness > Resources.
Because with resourcefulness you are a creator of any resources you desire. What most people view as rejection and failure is almost as equally satisfying as a win for you. Because you’ve been gifted wisdom, experience, data, and feedback as to your strategy and current skills
“Point one finger at others and you’ll see three pointing back at you” – Read yesterdays post on The Seven Essene Mirrors. Bad results in life reflect back corrupted/inauthentic/artificial parts of ourselves, our inner world. Failures and rejections do us a favor, shining light on these and we tweak these and our strategy and skills improve. Becoming more true to ourselves in the process.
Remember the Leveling Theory. This also applies to how good life can get. In your current reality you have no idea how good life can be 10-20 realities higher up.
When I was making $400/month I had no idea it was possible to make and enjoy $40,000/months with such ease and joy. Because I couldn’t even see that reality it was so distant from my current one. But that reality jump which seemed overnight came from developing the skills, and playing tons of hands.
Playing many hands + developing how effective you are with each hand. Probabilities start to narrow down getting more and more in your favor. Then…BOOM, your big breakthrough month, year finally lands because you allowed it to land by getting out of your own way.
This is confirmation that feedback determines strategy not self worth. It is not a positive artificial feel good quote. I am equally the same person, I look the same, have the same sense of humor, dress the same. But my soul, me, I am still and always will be Youssef. The only difference is my skills and strategy leveled up and grew as I played the game. Playing more hands also aligned probabilities in my favor to hit a jackpot.
So how can feedback ever change our self worth?…. Only through misinterpretation and illusion it can.
This is the secret to consistency, growth, winning. Hacking the simulation to rig life in your favor. While everyone is conditioned by default to hardly roll the dice, you realize it’s an illusion, bringing something to the table to lose. You rig life in your favor when you realize you can keep rolling the dice forever, there was no need to buy-in with chips of emotional capital. You don’t need to buy chips of self-worth to cash into the table. You realize you can keep rolling forever. This realization and implementation is your unfair advantage
Playing to not lose vs Playing to WIN
Flip the switch
This is the gambling problem we all have, it’s not about Vegas. It’s not betting on ourselves. Projecting a belief, a artificial illusion that we have something to lose.
- Show up to life and play the game, don’t let it play you.
- Bet on yourself and you can never lose. Growth or Wins
- Play to WIN, not playing to not lose. You have nothing to lose. It’s an illusion of the mind
- This is the unfair advantage. The house edge. Life’s gamble
Fortune favors the bold